In the few weeks leading up to the birth of our sweet boy, I was having a ton of contractions. Most seemed to be intense braxton hicks, with the occasional “real” contraction mixed in. But on the wednesday evening of my 37th week, I woke up around 1:30am with quite a few real contractions and couldn’t seem to sleep through them. I decided to time them and they were about 6.5 mins apart, and lasting about a minute each. I thought for sure it was happening, although my logical side of my brain told me it had to be too early to be the real thing. Nonetheless, I couldn’t sleep so I got up, walked around the house a bit, ate a snack and drank an electrolyte drink just in case it ended up being labor. By about 3:00 I got Ryley up because I wasn’t sure if we should call the midwife or just keep waiting. Our midwife was out of town with her family so we would be calling the on-call line. With a history of fast labors, I wanted to make sure we gave them enough warning to get here in time if this was it, but I also didn’t want to have them come all the way out to our house in the middle of the night for a false alarm. Those two thoughts continued to compete for space in my mind as I bounced on the birth ball and did “figure 8’s” through the contractions. We decided that if the contractions got closer to 5 minutes apart we would call.
As luck would have it, contractions started to dwindle by about 4:30am and I went back to bed. I felt totally discouraged, but also felt like I knew it couldn’t be the real thing just yet. The contractions continued throughout the next day as I went about our normal schedule and dropped Ramsey off at vacation bible school and all his other activities. I did end up sharing the details of these contractions with my midwife at my next appointment with her and she seemed surprised that it did not amount to the birth of our baby.
I mostly found myself staying in our air conditioning during the hot days to try to reduce the amount of swelling. We continued to walk our 4 miles each night after dinner. I continued to see my chiropractor a few times each week. I continued to have lots of real contractions overnight each night, but nothing timable or regular. All seemed to be going smoothly, but I was definitely feeling anxious about being able to tell when labor was really happening because of all the contractions that didn’t end up turning into labor.
In those final weeks, it felt so strange to be walking around, doing our normal life while knowing that at any moment, it could all start and everything would change! I found my mind was really only able to focus on thinking about the birth- I listened to episodes of birth podcasts basically all day long and we spent a ton of time talking about the birth and mentally preparing for different scenarios that could play out.
At 39 weeks, I went to my Monday morning appointment with my chiropractor and scheduled my next couple appointments- including one for Friday of that week where I asked if he could do all the acupressure points if I was still pregnant. With my other two children, the acupressure points worked like a charm to get things moving along!
On August 15th, I went to bed with no signs of labor. Overnight I got up several times feeling like I needed to poop. I would go sit on the toilet, sometimes feeling a bit sweaty/nauseous, but wasn’t able to go to poop at all, so I would go back to bed. There weren’t any contractions so I figured it was just another end of pregnancy symptom since there wasn’t a lot of room in there for things to move through.
At 5:49am on Friday, August 16th, I woke up to a contraction that was reasonably intense. I got out my phone and started timing them, but wasn’t sure if it was really labor. I timed 2 or 3 contractions and they seemed to be building in intensity very rapidly. They were about 2 minutes apart and lasting for about a minute long each time. I went over to Ryley and told him I think I might be in labor, but I wasn’t sure. He got up and we decided that since they were so close together and intense already that we should just call the midwife right away.
We called the on-call line about 6:00am. The midwife on call asked us lots of questions, which we didn’t really have great answers to because we had basically just woken up, and on the surface it seemed like maybe we weren’t too far along in the labor. But my gut was telling me otherwise just based on the intensity of the contractions. She asked things like, had we lost the mucus plug… no… did I have a bloody show… no… how long had we been timing contractions… well only about 10 mins. With that information she told me to go get dressed, eat some breakfast and give a call back in about an hour. I wasn’t really sure what to say because my gut was screaming that that would’t work- I told her that I felt like if I did that that she would likely miss the birth. She seemed surprised and told me to go get dressed and call back in 10 mins.
Well, the next contraction was so intense that I told Ryley to just call our midwife, Angela directly. He called her and I texted her a screenshot of our contraction timer so she could see what was going on. She replied saying she’s on her way!
Our kids were up now and I told Ramsey it *might* be time for the baby to be born but I wasn’t sure so don’t get too excited yet. The kids just hung around in the bedroom with us while we started to prepare.
I tried to get myself dressed/ready for the day but the contractions were coming quickly and were very intense already. Ryley started filling the birth pool and getting our bed ready with a shower curtain liner and sheets. I was very scared because of how quickly things were progressing. I was crying a bit between contractions because I already was at a place of not being able to get comfortable or relaxed no matter what I tried.
I asked Ryley to get the birth ball and by the time he ran down to the living room to get it and got back up to our bedroom with it I was beyond being able to use it. I definitely had hit a place where mentally I felt like I knew there was no way our midwives were going to get there in time; it was going too fast. This terrified me. I felt completely out of control already.
The next contraction was when transition started. I had to get onto the bed because the birth pool didn’t quite have enough water in it. I was worried because I knew the midwife had said he needed to be born either completely under water or completely above water and I was worried it wasn’t deep enough for him to be born completely under. Somehow, in the midst of it all, I even texted her a picture of how much water was in there and asked if I could get in.
Once I got on the bed, the transition got really intense for me. My legs and feet were shaking through the contractions. I remember looking over at Ramsey and Valentina, who were standing at the foot of the bed together and they were cuddled up with Ramsey embracing Valley with both arms. I could tell they were nervous and I remember reminding them that this is just mommy’s body doing what it needs to do to bring our baby into the world and that all was well.
They were well prepared going into the birth- we had listened to so many birth podcasts together, talked through all the details about how birth might look and sound, and even watched a few birth videos together. Leading up to the birth, Ramsey was very excited and often said he wanted to catch the baby. Valley seemed more nervous/scared about it and wasn’t sure if she wanted to watch. We told her she could decide in the moment what felt right for her.
The next contraction my body started to instinctively push. Ryley called the midwife so she could be on the phone with us as he was being born. There was one more pushing contraction on the bed. With her on speakerphone, she asked Ryley if he could see a head. He said no, and I shouted back “There’s a head”!
Ryley knew I really wanted to try birthing in the water so he told the kids to go grab a snack and helped me get to the tub between contractions. (I don’t think he realized we were THAT close to the baby being born or he would have had the kids stay). But the contractions were coming right on top of one another so I barely had enough time to get to the tub before the next one started. I could feel it building so I quickly get my leg up and over the side of the tub, grabbed onto the handle on the birth tub, and got my knees down into the water. I only had time to get one hand down before the next contraction and I felt the bag of waters break; it felt like a little gush on my hand and all in the same moment, his whole head and body came out into the water. I screamed “The baby is out!” and picked him up out of the water and brought him to my chest. I was taken completely by surprise as with both my other births, baby’s head came out first and then there was a few second pause as we waited for the next contraction to bring the body out, but this one came out all at once! He was born in 19 contractions total! He was born at 6:42am; about 42mins after our first call to the midwives.
As with each of my babies, as soon as they are out, I always experience this moment where I feel like time stands still, and I silently hold my breath while my baby takes their first. It feels like an eternity as you go through this right of passage into motherhood and wait to hear that first little cry. I like to think of it as the moment when baby is between two worlds; the moment where the fragility of life versus death really sinks in. I waited for God to put breath into his lungs, and he let out his first little cry; I took a breath of relief and could sit back in the water onto the little built in seat. He was here! The kids came running to the side of the tub to meet their new baby brother.
At first he had a bit of fluid in his lungs from coming out so quickly- there wasn’t much time to be squeezed in the birth canal and clear some of the fluid. The midwives (still on the phone with us) had me lay him on my forearm with his head angled downward to try to use gravity to help clear some of the fluid. He was still a bit stuffy but was very alert and was beginning to turn nice and pink.
He was very alert- he opened his eyes and was looking around at me and each of the kids. He latched and nursed a bit. I kept him close to my body, kissed him and rubbed his soft skin and hair. He had dark hair- not as thick or dark as Valley’s, more similar to Ramsey’s but without the mohawk. The whole pregnancy the OB had been telling me he was a big baby, so I was surprised he seemed to small to me! The kids loved looking at him, Valley kept saying how cute he is, they loved touching the umbilical cord and asked so many good questions about everything birth related.
About 25 minutes after he was born, the midwives arrived. We were all just waiting, me and baby still in the birth pool. Ryley grabbed the camera and snapped a few photos for me. The placenta hadn’t been delivered yet. I decided to stay in the tub until after the placenta came out just to minimize messes and try to stay comfortable.
When contractions started back up to bring the placenta, I was caught really off guard by how painful they were. When the placenta was delivered with my other two babies, I barely noticed the contractions other than that it felt like jelly came out. I was expecting this one to be similar, but it was definitely very different. It felt as though I was going through transition again- I got really sweaty, nauseous, panicky. I needed a bucket nearby in case I were to get sick. The midwives were fanning me.
I actually had a moment of panic where I worried that it could be a second baby because it actually felt exactly like transition. My midwife reassured me it was not another baby- she felt my stomach and reminded me they would have seen it on the ultrasound. It took a while and I could not get comfortable during contractions, but eventually the placenta came out. The placenta was very large; even the midwives were surprised how large it was. They said it measured 41 weeks and even had a bit of calcification on it.
Once the placenta was out, they helped me get out of the water and into bed with baby. Both of my kiddos climbed in bed with me and baby and got to hold him and do skin to skin with him. The midwives monitored us and began cleaning things up.
They eventually weighed him and measured him! He was 8lbs 7oz. and 21.5 inches long. (bigger than Ramsey, smaller than Valley). They did a newborn exam on him and continued to monitor him and me. They helped me get to the bathroom and get something to eat and drink. Ramsey wanted a picture on his polaroid so they took a photo for us and tucked us all in as family of 5!
Shortly after, Grandma and Grandpa Laird arrived. They got to meet him and took the kids downstairs to eat and then outside to play. We facetimed with Aunt Tori, and talked on the phone with Pop Pop.
We did not have a name picked out ahead of time. It took a while before Ryley and I were left alone to really get a good look at him or even spend time together to process everything that had happened that morning. We did not name him until the end of the second day. Although we waited a bit to share it after that because I really just needed some time with him to be sure!
His full name is Calloway Lucas Laird. His first name we actually saw in the movie “It Takes Two”- it is the main character’s last name in the movie. His middle name is very special to us. When we had Ramsey we decided that since all of our children would obviously have the last name Laird that came from Ryley’s side of the family, that middle names would come from my side. Ramsey’s middle name is my dad’s name, and Valentina’s middle name is shared by her, me and my mom. We decided on Lucas because it has the same meaning as my mom’s name. Robyn means “bright” and Lucas means “bringer of light”. It was the perfect way to honor her.
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